Sunday, August 22, 2010

Jumping

I don't really know what to write here, except that I need to write something.  I refer back to this post wherein I described a fear of L doing a little "jumping".  Those fears have become reality.  She chose to not catch herself.  We can no longer catch her if she is unwilling for us to do so.  As Hubby and I deal with free-falling into a reality we did not choose, and one we fought mightily against, we wait for a phone call that she is now ready to be caught.   We are not sure where that phone call will come from, nor if it will in fact come at all.

How do parents deal with these types of situations? I'm still not sure.  I never, ever saw myself in this type of position.  I don't mean to be cryptic, but I really don't want to "air it all out" here.  I count myself blessed to know that many friends are praying for us and for her.  That is all anyone can do at this point.   Yet, who wants to be in a position where YOU are the one being prayed for, and worried about?  I don't want to be.  I'd rather be praying for someone else. Surely that is one of the keys.  That is what the gospel teaches.

We'll just have to wait a little while.....or, maybe a really long one this time.

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Satisfying Sunday

I feel very blessed tonight, as the weekend ends.  Do not interpret that as a weekend of great things, or easy things, or that any problems went away.  Quite the opposite.  But, the Lord blessed me with strength and with more inspiration.

Friday afternoon I had an email from my visiting teacher who gave "it" to me straight.  You know, the "it" that you don't want to hear but that you should anyway.  She is wise beyond her years, and took a risk.  She followed the Holy Spirit and told me things I needed to deal with.  She blesses my life.

I attended a session in the temple with my dear friend Diane on Friday afternoon.  She is great to just listen.   She doesn't push, doesn't give unsolicited advice.  She asked no questions about the challenges I currently face, and yet she knows well what they are.  She knew I did not want to discuss them - she followed the Spirit.  She is very wise and full of a fabulous sense of humor.  What did I do before she moved into the area?  And, I mean that, Diane. 

The temple is a place for learning, pondering, and for counting blessings.  I often don't learn a whole lot there, and I often come away feeling like I should have but that I messed up somewhere in that process.   This time was different - I was instructed by the Spirit.  Answers to prayers were given. 

There was a lot of difficulty with a certain "drama queen" in my life.  Crises could have occurred.  The Spirit walked by my side and helped me walk her through some great difficulty.  Tonight, things are calm.

As I serve in my church calling, I often visit the Relief Society lessons of other wards on Sundays.  Last night at the last minute, I decided that today I would attend one in a nearby town.  The lesson was given by their Relief Society president and it was entitled, "Remember Lot's Wife".   Her lesson was about moving forward and not looking back.  I needed to hear that today.  I was again blessed with the Spirit confirming these truths to me.  I was also inspired by the testimonies given by several sisters.

I try to chat with other sisters in our stake when I visit their meetings.  I spoke with two women I had never met before who have no idea how they blessed my life today.   They thanked me for things that I had done in my calling - things that I had hoped would affect someone, but had no way of knowing if they had.  Those are the "pay-off" moments.  Those moments are humbling and gratifying.  Those moments make us grateful to be in His service.  I am blessed.  I am so grateful.